This is not what you thought your middle-age life would look like.
You’ve raised your kids, worked hard and now you’d like to relax and enjoy your life. Instead, you’re spending time and energy looking out for your elderly Mom’s increasing needs.
Just because it’s different than you imagined, it doesn’t have to be awful, overwhelming and maddening.
You can decide what your level of involvement with your Mom looks like and feel good about it.
You can still travel and spend time with your own family knowing that Mom is okay.
Your life will not be taken over by the desire of your Mom to remain “independent” (which REALLY means you’re doing everything for her)
You don’t have to resent her when she thinks you’re not doing it right.
You can enjoy midlife and the freedom that comes with it while your Mom is still alive.
1 in 5 adults is involved in the care and keeping of an elderly parent. Which means you're not alone and everyone else thinks they’re doing it wrong too.
“Before my coaching calls with Mary, I felt a lot of anxiety but I wasn’t sure where or what the source was. I was feeling resentment, anger and frustration towards my siblings, and to some extent, toward my parents also. I did not feel as though I was giving my parents my very best self.
Now I feel empowered, more than anything. I feel as though I have the tools in my toolbelt to face each situation that arises with regard to the care of my parents and the ensuing discussions that I will have to have with my siblings.”
— Megan R.
“I did personal coaching with Mary to help me with my relationship with my aging parents. It was beyond helpful. I see my frustration level much lower but more importantly I am able to enjoy my time with my parents so much more.
If you are open to looking at your thinking you will benefit greatly from working with Mary. Make whatever amount of time you have left with your parents the best for everyone. Thank you, Mary for all your support and instruction.”
— Vicki Z.
I offer you The Caregiver Coaching Experience, a 12 week 1:1 coaching package so you can create the EXACT plan you need to care for Mom and cut your anxiety and overwhelm in half.
Each week you’ll have the opportunity to unload the pressure that you feel caring for your Mom in space where judgement doesn’t exist. Sorting it all out during our call allows you to clearly see what you want to do in your specific situation, free of concern for what others may think.
Here’s what you get with The Caregiver Coaching Experience:
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12 one to one coaching sessions
…so you can sort out what’s necessary and what’s noise. From this space of clarity, you fully own your decisions and you can see the life you’re creating for yourself.
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Weekly Wisdom Tracker
…a powerful process you will learn to use to track your insights and thought processes so you can see just how far you’ve come. This is a visual reminder of what you control and why it matters.
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Daily Text & Email Support
…so you can reinforce the new skills you're learning to work with your Mom and be fully supported in your day to day experience. This is a game changer. You don’t need to wait a week to get clarity on a situation. It’s available today.
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Annual Caregiver Retreat
…so you can rest and reset with women that are in the thick of life as a caregiver. This is not about your Mom’s needs, this is for YOU minus the guilt. You’re already my client, so this is offered at a reduced rate.
How do I get access to all of this?
Step 1: Schedule a call with me to discuss your unique situation.
Step 2: Schedule your first session.
I’ve got your back.
I promise that you will learn what’s possible for you before it’s too late. You won’t wait until your Mom has passed to relax and begin living your life again.
The time we spend together will equip you with all that you need to know to wake up in the morning confident that you can handle anything that comes up. You’ll go to sleep at night secure in knowing that you’re doing enough for your Mom.
I know what it’s like to wrestle with the feelings of obligation around elderly parent care. My career spanning 25 years in geriatric healthcare did not prepare me for the confusing emotions that caring for my Mom triggered. I wanted to help out and “do the right thing”, but how could I balance that with my own life?
There were a lot of things I didn’t do well. I paid attention to what other families looked like. I used my Mom’s happiness as a barometer to see if I was doing it “right”. I learned so much on the family side that I didn’t get to experience in the healthcare role and it hurt.
I created this program to help every adult daughter navigate their parent’s final years without sacrificing their own sanity.
“Before my coaching calls with Mary, I felt, overwhelmed and unprepared to manage my mom’s care now and in the future.
Now I feel compassion for myself and for my mom, no matter what she says to me or about me. I have learned it is okay to feel both happy and sad. When I allow myself to cry the episode ends quickly and I feel compassion. I question my thoughts, whether they are true, and replace them with new a thought.”
— Heidi Q.
Here’s What Others Have Asked Before Working With Me…
What if my relationship with my Mom is too far gone?
I get this a lot, and I want to let you know that it just isn’t possible. Even if your parent has already passed, you can create the relationship you want. I know, I know… it sounds crazy to think that you can create a solid relationship based on your worth as a human! We’re taught so differently. But I’ll let you in on a little secret. The bulk of my own work on the relationship with my Mom was done months after she died. I’ll show you how relationships are created and best experienced even when you want to change everything about her.
What’s the difference between coaching and counselling?
Coaching is great for people who are functioning on a daily basis and want to improve their life. It’s like a tune up of your thoughts and emotions that creates a better daily experience. Counseling is great too, and is always encouraged for anyone who is not able to function. However, I find that my clients don’t need someone agreeing with them or validating their negative experience, but someone to show them that they already have the answers and tap into their own confidence to make difficult decisions.
I don’t think I have time for this between Mom’s appointments and my life?
You don’t have time NOT to spend time on this. Let’s face it, the days, weeks and months are going to pass by and one day your Mom is going to die. Spending an hour each week for the next 12 weeks is the best chance you have to one day stand at their gravesite with no regrets for how you experienced your relationship with them.
Do you offer refunds?
I believe so deeply in this work that I guarantee your results. When we work together for 12 sessions, you show up each time with a willingness to be coached and you implement what we discuss, I promise you will get results. Your experience of your Mom will change for the better. If it doesn’t, I will refund you. Simple as that.
I have more questions, how can I get in touch?
Email me at mary at maryremmes.com and I will be happy to answer any additional questions you have.
Your Mom will continue to age and it’s likely that her needs are only going to increase.
Sure, you could continue letting Mom’s needs and wants consume your life until she’s gone so you can resume your own life, but that will most likely end up in resentment and guilt. Or you can wait for Mom’s attagirl, which let’s be honest, will probably never come and if it does, it will be a blip on your emotional radar... and then it’s right back into the weeds of daily caregiving.
12 hours is all it takes to create the relationship you want with your Mom.
12 weeks to learn the skills that will change every facet of your life.
3 months to clearly define who you are and learn to make confident decisions for your Mom’s care minus the guilt and drama while not making this your entire life.
You can’t just keep putting off your life hoping things will get better. Let’s ensure that whatever time you have left with you Mom on this Earth is spent exactly how you want to spend it.
Book a free consult session today and see if it’s right for you.
There’s no commitment, pressure, or obligation.